Are we confusing this with mental ill-health!? 🤔
Happy spring time! I love this time of year! With spring comes the chance for new beginnings and fresh starts. Of course, we can do this at any time, but the coming of spring can be a helpful reminder that things can, and do, change. This sometimes happens whether we like it or not.
This time I wanted to address the term ‘mental health’ and how, I believe, it can be confused for something else. Our mental wellbeing has always been of importance, and as we’ve already discussed here, its significance has been documented as early as c400BC by the ancient philosopher Plato and the physician Hippocrates. However, lately it seems we have developed a mental health crisis. I believe this has partly been brought to our attention as a result of the measures put into place during the COVID years, but I believe the problem has been brewing since long before then.
The causes of poor mental health are multi-factorial, which is the premise behind our work at Mental Health Getaway. We cannot properly remedy anything without addressing the root cause.
A pill or talking therapy is often merely a sticking plaster that may, or may not, quell the problem for a while. However, eventually the balance shifts, our ‘mental wellbeing tank’ spills over and a period of poor mental health seems to start again. All the while, it has been brewing in the background and we’ve just about been able to keep a lid on it.
So what is causing this ‘mental wellbeing tank’ to spill over? I consider it to be overwhelm.
Overwhelm is broadly defined as “…to bury or drown beneath a huge mass of something or to have a strong emotional effect”. There are lots of causes of overwhelm in today’s modern world, which is almost always associated with a loss of control and/or fear of the unknown, and includes:
excessive workload;
conflict at work or home;
financial pressures;
taking on too many responsibilities;
trying to do too much;
trying to please others;
being a perfectionist or having high expectations of both ourselves and others;
comparing ourselves with what we perceive in others, or what we believe we should be or do;
loss of any form, be it financial, personal, physical or emotional;
ill-health;
traumatic experiences;
political, social, environmental or technological concerns including news and social media;
sensory overload due to incessant notifications, alarms, emails, text messages and other demands on our attention;
major life events like moving house, relationship breakdown, having a baby etc;
biological disposition, such as having the COMT gene;
…basically modern life!
This is exacerbated when we:
don’t have any separation from work and home life, i.e. we take work home with us and work, or contemplate it, outside of work hours;
don’t have help, such as with children or the home responsibilities;
don’t feel like we are able to spend time on the areas of life we’d like to, such as spending time with our children rather than earning money to put food on the table;
don’t have psychological, physical or emotional boundaries;
don’t have the emotional or psychological support and tools to manage;
aren’t tending to our basic human needs of proper nutrition, sleep and social connection for example.
Mental wellbeing
Overwhelm impacts our mental wellbeing as it leaves us feeling like a failure as we can’t do it all, it make us feel inadequate, not good enough, or too scared to try something different. It leaves us questioning what if I fail, and will I end up with bigger problems, or more to do.
We will discuss the controversial cause of overwhelm more deeply next time, but how can we manage our feelings?
What can we do
Firstly, we must acknowledge that we feel overwhelmed. This is true from our perspective, whether or not someone else would consider it to be so. Then we must find the cause, or more likely causes, of our overwhelm. Look back at the above list and find which ones it is for you, or maybe there is something I have missed. I recommend writing a list. This is something we delve deeply into on our Getaways.
Once we have understood root cause, then we can look at ways to manage the causes and our resultant feelings, including:
put in place boundaries about our workload, how much and what work we will take on;
make use of available help at work, such as colleagues, secretaries, PAs or interns;
ask for help from those around us in our personal lives;
make use of available childcare including clubs, play-dates, babysitters and nannies;
make use of available help around the home including cleaners, gardeners and handy people;
say ‘no’, or ‘not right now’;
write lists and prioritise accordingly;
decide what is important to us, which is one of the exercises we do on our getaways;
communicate our perspective and needs with a partner if we have one, and discuss how we can better understand and support each other;
break-down large projects or problems into small, manageable steps that can be easily achieved;
learn time-management techniques;
develop our resilience through coaching, counselling, cognitive behavioural therapy or self-development activities like introspection and habit-change;
exercise to improve stress-reduction;
understand the importance of downtime and make time for this;
practice relaxation activities, mindfulness and meditation;
avoid listening to or looking at news and social media, and understanding the limits to its objectivity.
Several of these require the availability of help and money, which may not be possible for some people. However, many of these techniques are free and readily available to anyone, if they are willing to make use of them.
So whilst overwhelm does impact our mental health, I do think we need to separate the two and understand that overwhelm is a symptom of today’s society and the way we live our lives. With that in mind, we can better manage our sense of overwhelm and ultimately, our mental health.
Until next time when we will delve more deeply into the controversial causes of overwhelm.
Well wishes,
Andie. x
Image: Icon by ppangman courtesy of www.freepik.com